“When I read the news that there would be a Senior Citizens Parade in Pe Ell during Covid, I was taken aback by the imminent mass suicide that this event seemed to be. I worried for the population meant to, quite literally, march to their deaths. I, for one, am also affected each day by a disorder, similar to the disorder of the elderly (old age). From my experience of having a disorder, I knew no one would advocate for these beloved, ghastly, scathing, contrarians... so I took it upon myself to drag my decaying body into this gas station and beg them for mercy on the seniors. The manager called every authority he knew in America, including the vice president of a local small business, and squealed words of contempt into their bloody ears. "The show must go on!", were the last words spoken by a certain dreary, blue (yet bright) eyed neopolitician before he shoved each senior citizen individually down the street, forcing them to use bb guns to shoot out those strawberry candies no one likes and those peanut candies people like even less at unsuspecting children. It was at this point that the entire gas station staff assisted me in carrying each senior back to safety, piling them in covered wagons and motorcycles alike, transporting them with great haste to a better life, a better place, a better time. Thank the good lord for this, as there was absolutely no need to host a senior citizens parade during a global pandemic that is likely to kill senior citizens specifically.”
We can help you find the nearest gas station based on your geolocation. Within seconds, we can give you a list of every gas station in your area, even if you have no idea where you are. Find BP, Shell, Chevron, Mobil, RaceTrac, Wawa, and more anywhere that you happen to go. Gas up and grab a cold drink for the road. Don't forget snacks too. That's what road trips are built on. A full tank of gas, great tunes, and solid snacks for munching while you're on the go. We'll get you there.
Gas Stations
“When I read the news that there would be a Senior Citizens Parade in Pe Ell during Covid, I was taken aback by the imminent mass suicide that this event seemed to be. I worried for the population meant to, quite literally, march to their deaths. I, for one, am also affected each day by a disorder, similar to the disorder of the elderly (old age). From my experience of having a disorder, I knew no one would advocate for these beloved, ghastly, scathing, contrarians... so I took it upon myself to drag my decaying body into this gas station and beg them for mercy on the seniors. The manager called every authority he knew in America, including the vice president of a local small business, and squealed words of contempt into their bloody ears. "The show must go on!", were the last words spoken by a certain dreary, blue (yet bright) eyed neopolitician before he shoved each senior citizen individually down the street, forcing them to use bb guns to shoot out those strawberry candies no one likes and those peanut candies people like even less at unsuspecting children. It was at this point that the entire gas station staff assisted me in carrying each senior back to safety, piling them in covered wagons and motorcycles alike, transporting them with great haste to a better life, a better place, a better time. Thank the good lord for this, as there was absolutely no need to host a senior citizens parade during a global pandemic that is likely to kill senior citizens specifically.”